Prince Harry’s connection with Prince William faced a critical juncture when Harry became emotional during a public address.
In a less commonly mentioned part of his book “Spare,” the Duke of Sussex disclosed that as recently as October 2019, William thought therapy had negatively influenced him and considered him to be in poor health.
Their conversation is similar to their mother, Princess Diana’s experiences within the royal life. Diana, back in 1995, told the BBC that her struggles with depression resulted in her being labeled as “unstable” and “mentally unbalanced.”
Yet, what stands out in this exchange is Harry’s admission that he revisits their messages. He confides, “I kept those texts. They’re still with me. I occasionally read them, feeling sadness and confusion, wondering how we reached such a point.”
It seems that Harry regarded this argument, which occurred just a month before he departed for Canada, as the moment when he truly realized, “I became a stranger to my older brother.”
While Harry doesn’t divulge the full details of their exchange, it’s possible that his wife, Meghan Markle, played a role in their disagreements. Nevertheless, Harry appears to attribute his personal emotional growth through therapy as a significant factor in their differences of perspective.
The Royal Brothers’ Heartfelt Confrontation
Harry recounted an emotional breakdown he experienced during a public speech at the WellChild Awards in October 2019, where he spoke about the early days of Meghan’s pregnancy, a year prior.
“Soon after, I got a text from Willy,” Harry revealed. “He was in Pakistan on tour. He said I was clearly struggling, and he was worried about me. I thanked him for his concern, assured him I was fine. I’d become emotional in front of a roomful of sick kids and their folks just after becoming a father myself—nothing abnormal in that.”
Harry continued, “He said I wasn’t well. He said again that I needed help. I reminded him that I was doing therapy. In fact, he’d recently told me he wanted to accompany me to a session because he suspected I was being ‘brainwashed.'”
“‘Then come,’ I said. ‘It will be good for you. Good for us.’ He never came.”
Harry described a heated exchange of text messages that lasted for 72 hours while William was on an international Pakistan tour.
Though not explicitly stated in his book, these exchanges took place just days before the broadcast of an ITV documentary in which Meghan openly expressed her struggles and Harry acknowledged that he and William were on separate paths. The documentary had been filmed weeks earlier during the Sussexes’ visit to South Africa.
Harry wrote, “His strategy was patently obvious. I was unwell, which meant I was unwise.”
He continued, “Back and forth we went, all day, late into the night—we’d never had a fight like that over text before. Angry, but also miles apart, as if we were speaking different languages.”
“Now and then, it dawned on me that my worst fear was coming true: after months of therapy and hard work to become more self-aware and independent, I was a stranger to my older brother. He could no longer relate to me—tolerate me. Or maybe it was just the stress of the last few years, the last few decades, finally pouring out. I saved the texts, I have them still. I read them sometimes, with sadness, with confusion, thinking: How did we ever get there?
Harry concluded by sharing William’s final texts, in which he expressed his love and deep concern for him. William promised to do whatever it took to help him and urged him never to feel otherwise.
A month later, in November, Harry and Meghan left Britain for Canada, and by January 2020, they announced their decision to step back from their royal duties.
The Background of the Harry and William Rift
Before the dramatic 72-hour exchange between Harry and William, tensions had already been simmering among the royal brothers. These disagreements appeared to originate before Harry and Meghan’s wedding in May 2018.
In his book “Spare,” Harry details how Meghan inadvertently offended Kate early on by mentioning “baby brain.” By June, the friction had escalated to the point where William accused Meghan of rudeness.
During that summer, Harry described a toxic atmosphere within their shared private office, with staff visibly distressed. William attributed the discord to Meghan.
By October 2018, Kensington Palace’s press secretary, Jason Knauf, accused Meghan of bullying two personal assistants in an internal email. By January 2019, Meghan was struggling with suicidal thoughts amid a relentless wave of negative media attention.
During the same year, Harry and Meghan formally separated from William and Kate, establishing a new private office under Buckingham Palace’s umbrella.
Much of the rupture between Harry and William had already unfolded by the time of their 72-hour argument.
Furthermore, Harry had already hinted at the divide in the ITV documentary “Harry & Meghan: An African Journey,” filmed during their tour of Southern Africa in September and early October. In the documentary, Harry stated, “We’re certainly on different paths at the moment.”
After their return, Harry gave the emotional WellChild speech, where he opened up about becoming a parent. Soon after, the documentary aired, marking Harry’s first public acknowledgment of the rift with William.
Following this, Kensington Palace sources indicated that William was concerned about his brother’s well-being, considering him to be in a “fragile” state.
Omid Scobie, who later authored the bestselling biography “Finding Freedom” about Harry and Meghan, reported at the time that Kensington Palace sources stated that William had watched the documentary and expressed concerns about Harry’s fragile condition.